Changes

Me - wondering which way to go next at Wollerton Old Hall gardens

I thought the unthinkable today. I even surprised myself with how little resistance the idea had in my mind. What precipitated this? An email - an email from the RHS telling me I could now buy tickets for next year's Flower Shows.

I had decided after being seriously disappointed by the Hampton Court Flower Show this year, and a less than inspiring trip to Malvern for the Spring Show, that my going to flower show days were over. Their appeal was lost on me. One of us had changed so much, that we were no longer compatible. The love affair was over.

Don't misunderstand me, I still love gardens, I still love design, and I still love plants, but not in the all consuming passionate way I did. I still love cultivating my own plants and growing my own fruit and vegetables, its just all the other stuff that seems to have fallen by the wayside. I am not sure what changed my attitude, but it has certainly jaded, and even my much-loved vast collection of books on the subject acquired over many years are bound for eBay over the next few weeks.

So what was the unthinkable thought? I decided that I might as well cancel my RHS membership. I couldn't see any reason to belong. In fact I felt so alien from what the RHS seemed to be about these days, that I wondered why I ever thought of joining in the first place. I no longer read The Garden magazine, and it and Gardens Illustrated, most months end up consigned to the communal shed at the Allotments virtually unread. The English Garden which had been my favourite of all the magazines often ends up being recycled unread too. How did I get so bored of it? How did we fall out of love so completely? Did familiarity breed contempt?

I am still stunned by this realisation, and wondered if anyone else had begun to feel differently about their interests?

Comments

Jane Alexander 31 October 2011 at 19:22

Yup. Totally. I no longer needlepoint - partly because I can't see what I'm doing anymore and partly because I no longer watch TV (and it used to be a way I justified watching TV - ie that I was being productive!). But mainly because I really can't be bothered! I think we shift and change and it's a sign of a young and vibrant mind that you want to move on and do other things... :)

bev 31 October 2011 at 19:38

My little one You've realised that doing is better than watching and though we may get some inspiration from these magazines and places sometimes they also make us feel less than adequate and to be fair they are usually owned or were originally owned by wealthier people (I adore Highgrove oh to have such a Garden, do you get my point) Same as you I love pickling onions n beetroot , my Lottie my garden and my pretty sheds we may not get them perfect but we've tried. Go with it girl enjoy simple pleasures we only have 5 senses taste touch smell hearing and vision and they are the best of all Take Care Bev

Carol Rider 31 October 2011 at 23:15

Same here. Find anything RHS too expensive, too middle class, too commercial. Same with the National Trust. My tastes and fancies are on the change too. Sewing and knitting are receding, probably due to lack of me time - but I'm not really missing it. Haven't got the concentration at the mo for reading so just concentrating on getting the kitchen done.

Magic Cochin 01 November 2011 at 12:40

Did I write that penultimate paragraph? I could have... I had the very same thought in the summer and after about 15yrs didn't renew my RHS membership. Like you, I still love our garden, plants are my passion, I love all aspects of working in the garden and growing veg, fruit and flowers ... it's in my genes and will never ever change.
But what do I get from my RHS membership? I couldn't think of one good reason to rejoin, so I didn't, and I haven't missed it one bit!

Celia
x

Victoria 03 November 2011 at 13:12

I agree with Jane - I think you've moved on. I don't think you're bored with gardening though, just bored with certain aspects of it. Maybe it's part of getting older, but I find that one becomes far more content with the process of gardening rather than the endless search for new ideas and plants. I know I should spend more time looking at other people's gardens, but that sometimes seems daft when I seem to have so little time to spend in my own.

elizabethm 05 November 2011 at 22:58

I do get this. I have been wondering whether to bother with an RHS show this year. I have been to shows and loved them and enjoy meeting other people who really care about planting and gardening. What really excites me though is the doing of it, in my own place. 80% and more of what I see in show gardens won't transfer here and more and more what I want to do is to make my own world. I was never a plantsperson. I am glad some people are as without them we would not have the excitement and the range of things to grow but for me it is a little bit too much like collecting. I was never a collector. I am still an RHS member, and like the new version of The Garden better than the old, but really I am beginning to wonder if I just need to dig.

VP 08 November 2011 at 17:18

It's a natural thing I think, to feel this way particularly when the nights draw in. I've certainly been feeling a bit restless lately and I've seen it in others recently too.

Your later post re your family leaving shows you're ready to move on - onwards and upwards I hope.

I questioned my RHS membership a while ago and realised the things I value it for are its independent research and stuff like the AGM. The kind of thing they've not publicised that well so far. For me it's even more important to support that in whatever small way I can now that funding of independent research is becoming increasingly difficult.

Zöe Lynch's Blog

Comments